Teresa the Toughwoman

by T. Trolley

I met Teresa in the late `80s. She was 32, a gorgeous green-eyed brunette from Detroit who was 5-2 and a quarter (she was always insistent about that quarter inch), weighed about 145 lbs. and from the neck down looked just like Dolly Parton as she was a 40DD.

Early in our relationship, she told me of her physical fighting ability and exploits -- long before I told her what a "turn-on" that kind of thing was for me. She told me she was "strong for a woman" and "loved to rough house."

She also told me she had had lots of fights in her past as she was a former girl streetgang leader. She also had lots of fights against other girls in her school and often went to other schools to look for more girls to fight.

According to her, she had a very strong back which she used to add more powerto her punches -- most to the body --when she fought.

She told me she once beat a girl streetgang leader to become the head of the gang. One afternoon, while she was in high school, she was trying to fix her bike when the leader of the gang came up to her and tried to intimidate her. She was several inches taller than Teresa, but one thing led to another and pretty soon they were on the ground, rolling around, fighting.

As the two rolled around, Teresa said the asphalt they were wrestling on hurt her back. But she got on top of the girl who was three inches taller than her and hit her hard in the head and said it was like "hitting a

watermelon." She won the fight as those watching had to pull her off her.

She said, because of that fight, "I found out that if you hit somebody in the head, you're liable to hurt your hand a whole lot worse than you hurt the other person. So I always tried to hit them in the sternum. Yeah, I know

it's dangerous. But it's better than breaking your hand."

In addition, she knew a few amateur wrestling moves such as the half nelson and cradles, which she picked up as a cheerleader for her high school boy's wrestling team. In fact, she once claimed claimed that she could get out of

any hold, so I schoolboy pinned her and, after giving me a big smile, began turning her head to the right and digging her teeth into my wrist to escape.

She was streetwise and knew how to take care of herself but was still the ultimate in femininity. She said she had a motto when it came to fighting, which was, "I may be a runt, but by the time I'm done with you you'll know I

was there." She was an avid NRA member and was one of those people who could give a person a glare that, if looks could kill, would have slain the person on the spot.

When I told her about the fact that women fighting was a turn-on for me, we had quite a bit of "fun" with it. She would tell me about the real-life fights she had with other girls and women in detail. She even drew sketches for me depicting herself fighting other women. In two

sketches, she had herself in a cheetah costume pinning two other women, putting one in a headlock and also being put in a reverse facelock/choke. Just looking at these sketches showed me that she was definitely a

"combative woman" as she knew too much to not have been involved in fighting herself.

She claimed she could even gauge if a woman was a good fighter by looking at her hips. She also could look at a celebrity and tell if she would be a good fighter or not. Marie Osmond, Jill Whelan and Cher -- no. Susan Anton,

Heather Locklear -- yes. She hated Victoria Principal and often talked about fighting her. She would avoid fighting other girls who were four or more inches taller than her. She would watch how they made fists and if they made

them with their thumbs tucked inside their fingers, she knew she'd beat them easily because they didn't know what they were doing.

On her own, she even suggested that she fight a match with me in attendance so that she could fulfill my fantasy (what a woman)! Of course, due to her streetfighting

background, she said she preferred a type of competition where she could use her fists, such as boxing or even streetfighting/UFC type matches.

One day, I heard about one of those Toughwoman boxing competition ripoffs put on by a local bar and gymnasium in my town. I figured this was the ideal time for Teresa to live up to her promise of fighting that match! So I

suggested it to her. At first, she sounded like she was going to back down. But after some coaxing, she agreed! After all, we both thought, Teresa actually had a chance of winning the thing!

It turned out that a co-worker of mine and a part-time model Janet, also signed up. Janet was a very attractive Hispanic woman, very athletic, and was also in her early 30s. She was about 5-4 and weighed about 125 lbs. She

was really into racquetball and signed up because she thought she was competitive enough to do well.

As luck would have it, Janet and Teresa were matched up in the very first match! Boy, was I excited! Janet and Teresa were both real attractive women, but it was obvious that Janet was in better physical condition than my Teresa. Plus, Teresa smoked a lot and I knew that for Teresa to win, she'd have to knock out Janet early or, as she admitted to me, she'd be in trouble because her three-pack-a-day cigarette habit would adversely affect her stamina.

Janet wore black shorts and white sleveless blouse while Teresa wore a micro-mini, low-cut, cheetah-print one-piece outfit that she had made herself, just for this fight! Wow, did they look goooood! I couldn't believe my eyes!

As is the case with the Toughwoman competition, the women fight three rounds, each round lasting just one minute. I thought that was good for Teresa due to the potential stamina problem because of her excessive smoking. The bell sounded for the start of the fight and, boy,was I excited!

Teresa preferred boxing to wrestling due to her ability to use her fists, picked up during her streetfight exploits. Thus, due to her previous fighting experiences, Teresa took the advantage at the bell and immediately drove Janet back with punches to the head and body as she flailed away like a maniac! For every punch Janet threw, Teresa was getting off two or three! And they were good ones! I was

yelling and cheering her on as she had Janet against the ropes and for a moment I thought they'd stop the bout and give it to Teresa since she really had Janet in trouble early! The round ended and I figured Teresa surely won

the first round -- she was great! I was so proud of her!

Teresa started out the second round the same way but then about midway into the round she began to tire due to that smoking habit of hers. Janet began to throw a lot of wild, untrained, haphazard punches and they began to meet their marks as they hit Teresa in the face! Janet was really mad at Teresa for beating her up early in the fight and now

she was matching Teresa punch for punch and Teresa's mouth began to open every once in a while as she struggled for air. She was fading fast. The bell rang and I was hoping Teresa won that round on the basis of her early performance. However, I thought more likely that it was

either a draw or Janet may have even pulled it out!

But the third round was disaster for Teresa. Her gas tank was completely empty andJanet ended up literally chasing her around the ring. Janet's fighting skills were a little weaker than Teresa's but Janet's superior fitness came out and Teresa was so tired that she could barely breathe! She

began to back up Teresa and hit her with some hard punches to the face and then a roundhouse right to the cheek! Teresa backed into the ropes and then turned away, obviously winded and looking for a way out! Janet hit Teresa in the temple with another roundhouse right with Teresa's back to her and the ref immediately stepped between the two and gave my girl an eight-count! I

knew that would be the icing on the cake to finish Teresa.

The fight continued and Teresa hung in there, throwing punches bravely though weakly as Janet tried to finish her off. The bell rang, saving Teresa from the indignity of being KOed. But Janet was announced the winner by all three judges by unanimous decision. Teresa felt humiliated and embarrassed at having lost in front of me and Janet ribbed me quite a bit about how she "kicked Teresa's @$$" during work.

And that she did!